


Skeletons in my closet

by Anonymous



Series: Skeletons [1]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Mentioned sexual grooming of a minor, non sexual grooming of a minor, vent fic, yet - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-27
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:08:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27222490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: The tags make it seem pretty bad but this is mostly just a vent fic. I would encourage people to read it tho.
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Series: Skeletons [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1988047
Comments: 10
Kudos: 120
Collections: Anonymous





	Skeletons in my closet

**Author's Note:**

> This is a vent fic about something I experienced when I was younger. There is discussion of sexual grooming of a minor (not Tommy or any other blockmen) And there is non sexual grooming of a minor as well.

Tommy had a hard time trusting. Well, nowadays at least. When he was younger, bright eyed and bushy tailed, he trusted people, maybe too much. Those were simpler times. Times when all he had to worry about was his middle school projects and what games he was going to play that day. Maybe talk to some of his older online friends. 

Tommy had tons of friends. He spent most of his free time online playing multiplayer games with randoms he could find, eventually he made friends with some of them. They were all nice to him. Treated him like the big man he is. 

His older friends treated him like one of them. They weren’t afraid to make sexual jokes around him. They would rant to him about their problems. He would always try to help them, it pained him to see his friends struggling. 

Tommy looks back on those times, older and wiser. Jaded and guarded, he thinks back on those times and he hates how stupid he was. How stupid it was of him to think that one of his 30 year old friends dating a 17 wasn’t weird. That it wasn’t weird that that same older friend would rant to him about his personal problems and have Tommy try to be a mediator in their “relationship”. 

Tommy hates how that older guy would take advantage of the younger boy's kindness. How he would use that against Tommy to indirectly blackmail that girl into staying in a relationship with the man. Tommy thought that man was his best friend. Thought that he always had his best interest in mind. Hell, he even bought Tommy shit for his birthday. 

Tommy thought he was helping the older man, his best friend. He was told by that man that the girl was just confused, in a bad spot, the man said her mother was abusing her. He said that he was going to move her out to live with him to help her out of that bad situation. Tommy believed him wholeheartedly, why wouldn’t he? All of their mutuals corroborated the man's story, even the girl herself said the same thing. 

Tommy’s best friend would tell him that he needed Tommy to go talk to the girl, convince her to stay with him. He said that it was for her own good, that she would listen to Tommy more than him. He would say, look at poor little 12 year old Tommy, look at how sad he would be if you left me. You don’t want Tommy to be sad do you? 

Tommy would often joke to the man about it. Calling him a pedo, as a joke. It was always a joke in their friend group but… was it really? No, no, it was never a joke, this man was a pedophile and Tommy, poor little 12 year old Tommy was complicit in his grooming of that girl. Hell, Tommy himself was being groomed, he would never acknowledge it, but it was the truth. 

Tommy was being groomed by these people, not sexually, they would never be explicitly sexual towards him. Did they make sexual jokes with him, sure, told him how good of a friend he was, sure. Tommy thought they were just being nice to him, he didn’t have many friends at school. They were all just using him, telling him he was their best friend, they tricked him into being complicit in the grooming of a 17 year old. 

After they’d gotten all their use out of his pressense, they threw him away. He wasn’t big strong mature Tom anymore. He was little baby Tommy, annoying Tommy. We don’t like you anymore, we can’t trick you now that you know that whats been going on is wrong. 

It hurt being left behind by his only friends, but god was it liberating. He was only 12 and he had been treated so shittily. At the same time he was happy to be out of the situation. He felt better than he had since he met these people.

-_-_-

Tommy’s 14 now. He’s just started streaming. He hasn’t a large fanbase yet, but he’s been slowly climbing. He’s been playing mostly solo games, or with randos. Never making friends, all his collaborations are born out of mutual benefit and not necessarily friendship. 

Tommy isn’t against making friends online. He just can’t trust people, even his classmates. He never told his parents. He was too scared that they would take away his technology until he moved out. 

_-_-_

Its been about a year and a half, Tommy’s made some people he might call friends. Maybe. He still can’t trust them. Well, he can trust Tubbo. Protect him from all these older people looking to be “friends” with them. 

Tommy isn’t sure what to think about Phil, Wilbur, and Techno. The people who the internet are claiming to be his pseudo family. He plays along of course, its good for his brand and it allows himself to trick his brain into thinking that nothing is wrong, if only for a short while. 

Sometimes during long streams like this he begins thinking about how his life would be different if he had never interacted with the internet in this way. 

After most of Tommy’s streams with anyone other than Tubbo, he would get stuck in his own head. Stuck thinking about all his fuck ups that were a result of his immaturity. Some days it would get so bad that it left him having panic attacks. He would try to sleep it off skipping meals he wouldn’t have eaten anyways. 

Being around these people was bad for his mental health. It was honest to god making him sick and as long as Tommy stayed quiet about it the worse it will get. He needs to either tell someone about his issues, even just to get it off his chest. Or Tommy needs to completely remove himself from the situation. Maybe disappear from the internet completely. He’s just exhausted, he can’t keep going like this. 

**Author's Note:**

> Please read this. So I made this because this is similar to something that happened to me when I was younger, it was pretty bad. I'm mostly just putting this out there cause I think its important for young people using the internet to be aware that not all grooming is sexual and that friendships with older adults online is kinda weirdchamp. Like I understand that many people think that its not weird having friends way older than you when you're younger, but it is! Ya gotta think about it using a critical somewhat cynical eye sometimes, why is this person being all buddy buddy with someone half their age? Also this is in no way me saying that I think that Tommy or Tubbo's friendship with older streamers is weird, however, it is me saying that they should be careful, not all people have good intentions. Also I might make a part 2 where Tommy either confronts them or removes himself from the situation for the sake of his mental health. I know my writing's kinda sucky but I really try my best.


End file.
